


Grant me a prayer (I have nothing left)

by Azukeri



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-03-28
Updated: 2013-04-07
Packaged: 2017-12-06 19:11:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/739132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Azukeri/pseuds/Azukeri
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I wish circumstances were different." Pierces the veil of silence and a man who was once a father finds himself making the decision to hear. To grant. A flicker of a hand and he creates. Let the wish be granted. Do with it what you will. Let the wish be granted.</p><p>Castiel Novak finds himself at the store once more looking for a brand of cookies or cereal that may or may not exist, all of this because of his brother Gabriel and the ridiculous grocery lists he invents. Still, having to run out so late for milk might have worked to his advantage, especially when he meets beautiful green eyes and for the first time in his life, finds himself breathless.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It seeps into the center of the world. A longing for strong by a being that was never suppose to know want. But he supposes really that it is his fault. After all, he wished for them to grow and now…

It seeps into the center of the world. A longing for strong by a being that was never suppose to know want. But he supposes really that it is his fault. After all, he wished for them to grow and now…

 

_I wish..._

 

_I wish..._

 

_I wish..._

 

A prayer in threes that makes him think twice as he unravels himself ever so slightly in his vessel. The injustice of it all, of all the endings and the ending and the end makes him ache. They will end in tears, he things, broken and beaten and he can do nothing. He has already done so much. His role in this story is over. All that is left is to write it into being. But….

_I wish..._

 

_“I wish circumstances were different.”_

_I wish you could have the life you deserved. That I could somehow be apart of it. I wish._

It’s a choice. He supposes, where he could intercede. Rewrite what was and is and let it become something more, but… but the lessons learned here have been too great. The sacrifices justified even if they feel unfair even to him.

 

Maybe just this once... He'll indulge in more than he has in centuries. Maybe he’ll grant some small miracle. After all, he is the creator. Let him create.

 

The water ripples like some great storm. And begins to fall on a world created anew.

 


	2. Well, if it jingles, it can't be makebelieve.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He swears to God if this is another one of Gabriel's idea of a joke, he will make sure that every stash of sweets that his older brother believes is secret will disappear off the face of the earth. But for now, Castiel resigns himself to reading the grocery list over once more and hope that somehow he's missed this one specific brand of cereal while checking the shelves. That or that the store merely does not stock this brand because of its diabetic inducing sugar levels. But more than likely Gabriel has gone as far as inventing a bloody jingle for a none existent prodoct in order to laugh in his face.

He swears to God if this is another one of Gabriel's idea of a joke, he will make sure that every stash of sweets that his older brother believes is secret will disappear off the face of the earth. But for now, Castiel resigns himself to reading the grocery list over once more and hope that somehow he's missed this one specific brand of cereal while checking the shelves. That or that the store merely does not stock this brand because of its diabetic inducing sugar levels. But more than likely Gabriel has gone as far as  _inventing_ a bloody jingle for a non-existent prodoct in order to laugh in his face. 

He finds this in no way comforting and almost misses living with Crowley. Then proceeds to remember that Crowley stole his girlfriend and therefore is useless and an assbutt. He smiles softly to himself and scans the shelves again. Assbutt. Hehe. 

"What's so funny about cereal?" A voice asks and he thinks about ignoring it, but turns and finds  _green._ It takes him a moment to remember to blink and not stare, but his voice feels caught in his throat and Castiel has to tear his eyes away before replying. 

"I was merely recollecting something humorous." And of course he has to be eight types of weird while talking to this gorgeous guy, because he can't be smooth like Balthazar or slick like Gabriel. He is Castiel. And to be Castiel is to be.. well odd. He honestly doesn't mind half the time, but the man with bright green eyes before him makes him wish for.. for more. Castiel shakes off the feeling before looking up and more properly taking in the face framing those green eyes, he regrets it fucking instantly. Freckles dust across a suntan face, lines of laughter tugging upward as the man before him half smiles and he is sooooo dooomed. Forever. Doomed. 

"Yeah? In the cereal aisle? Nice." He reaches over grabbing a box of Cheerios before frowning and grabbing a box of Trix instead and tucking it under several bags of vegatables before grinning maliciously. Then looking up sheepishly, "Um.. Sam won't let me eat a lot of sugar and he'll bitchface to Monday if he realizes I sunk those in there." Castiel nods in understanding and feels a little heartbroken that this man is clearly taken and in a long term relationship by the looks of it. But then again he never stood a chance. "I'm Dean."

"Castiel," He shakes the hand held out to him and tries not to note how Dean's hands are callus and gentle all at once. Tries not to imagine them on his skin, running up along his arms an- He flushes darkly, looking down and entoning. "Hello Dean." 

"Hey Cas," He glanced up at the nickname, head tilting for a moment in wonder and pleasant confusion. "Um, is it okay if I call you Cas?" The other man licked his lips, Castiel spent a moment too long staring at the way his tongue traced over it. He nodded slowly.

"Yes, it is merely that.. my own sibling's prefer a nickname that is far more... demeaning." Dean's face light up in joy then darkened as he frown. 

"Well then your brother's are dicks." Dean huffed and Castiel could only smile softly, because yes sometimes even the best of them were less than pleasant. 

"Which I could say the same about my brother, what the hell Dean!?" They both turned toward the owner of the voice that was more than vaguely annoying and as the man the size of a mountain  stared down at them with a petulant expression, he suddenly understood what Dean meant by 'bitchface.' He said so a moment later and Dean erupted into laughter as the other man bitchfaced more. " _Deaaaan_ , what the hell?"

"Sorry, Sammy." The green eyes shone like jade and Cas found himself wanting to make the man laugh more, when they turned to him, they almost seemed to soften and his heart clenched with something like hope. But again. He reminded himself, this man was taken. He had a partner named Sam an- "Cas, this is my brother Sam." -d oh.  _Oh._

 _  
_"It's a pleasure to meet you Sam." Castiel said honestly and shook the giant's hand, now soothed the man, Sam, smiled and he could see the family resemblance there. In their smiles alone.

"It's a pleasure to meet you too, Cas..?" Sam asked then looked to Dean with an accusing frown. 

"It's short for Castiel." He explained with ease and tensed as Dean suddenly threw an arm over his shoulder, then relaxed into it.

"Which is a fucking mouthful, so he's Cas." Dean turned and grinned, his face was all too close and Castiel could swear that his heart fucking stopped for a bloody moment before starting up all over again. "Ain't that right, Cas?"

"I suppose that if it is easier for you to handle then it is more than fine, after all I would not want to be one to bring you hardship because of your disabilities." Dean stared for a second while Sam burst into laughter immediately, Castiel could not resist smiling.

"You little bitch! Shut up Sam!" Dean screamed then glared at Cas. "I'm going to get you back for that."

"We just met I do not see how you wi-" "Easy," Dean cut him off and whipped out a marker from his jacket before taking Castiel's wrist and pushing up the sleeve of his jacket. "I'm giving you my number and you're going to call me, then I'm going to take you out and have a nice dinner and somewhere along the line, I'll have to get you back, Cas." 

"Or." Castiel took the marker with sure hands, "You could ask for my number instead." Sam stared with bated breath, unsure what to say as Cas and Dean stared till Dean smiled and nodded.

"Cas, can I have yo-" "Yes." He pushed aside Dean's sleeve and uncapped the marker with his teeth, in neat, quick strokes he wrote out his number and capped the marker before handing it back. "There."

"There." Dean agreed and stared a moment at the numbers on his arm and then at him. He smiled and Cas felt his insides light up. "Right, well.. We better get going and I'll be-" He tapped the number."-be calling you Castiel..?"

"Novak." He added with an understanding nod, "Castiel Novak."

"Dean Winchester." The other man offered and smiled again, then leaned forward glancing at the list that was once again in his hand. He grinned as he looked up, "By the way, that doesn't exist." He pointed to Gabriel's make believe cereal and Cas scowled at the paper. "Seeya Cas." He repeated and Castiel nodded once more. 

"Goodbye Dean." And there he was standing, staring at the shelf of cereals with a smile on his face. And really, he was going to buy Gabriel more chocolate. His brother deserved it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tralalalalalalala Review?


	3. It's a deer, it's elk, it's a fucking moose-sized Sammy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam groans for the millionth time and prods Dean's arm roughly, but it certainly didn't matter when he did it five minutes ago and he'll doubt it'll make a difference now. But all he can think is 'Why God, why?' while secretly being pleased that Dean even has it in him to smile after everything they've seen. Yeah, that sounds about right.

Sam groans for the millionth time and prods Dean's arm roughly, but it certainly didn't matter when he did it five minutes ago and he'll doubt it'll make a difference now. But all he can think is 'Why God, why?' while secretly being pleased that Dean even has it in him to smile after everything they've seen. Yeah, that sounds about right. But still the principle of the matter is that Dean is ignoring him while on a job and Sam has the right tobe fucking pissed about it. He jabs sharply in a spot near his brother's ribs that Sam knoooows is super bothersome to Dean.

Dean growled and slapped him hand away in response, "What the hell, Sam?" He bitchfaced in a way that he was sure read, 'Don't what the hell, Sam me. You're ignoring me.' "I am not. I'm working here." His brother gestured in the direction of the warehouse and Sam bitchfaces harder. "I am not distracted." He repeated with ease and Sam huffed, crossing his arms.   
  


"So you weren't thinking about your date with Cas just now?" He asked accusingly and Dean had the gall to flush. He narrowed his eyes and glared. "Seriously Dean!?"

"What?! Can't I look forward to it!?" He half scream before glaring. "You're alwaaaays fucking telling me to date and no-"

"Now I'm annoyed that you're acting like a love sick puppy on a stake out." Sam cut his brother off and Dean nearly freaking pouted. Swear to God, pouted. " _Dean."_

 _  
_"It's not that serious, Sam." But Sam remembers the way that Dean looked at the blue eyed wonder the other night and can't help to think that it's every kind of serious that even Dean wouldn't admit too. His face softens and Dean growls, glaring and punching him in the arm. "Shut up."

"I didn't say anything!" He huffed loudly, whining slightly and rubbing his shoulder, cause ow, Dean punched hard. "I was just makin-"

"A face." Dean growled. 

"This is my face!" Sam half shouted again and slumped in his seat, bitchfacing again. 

"Sam, this is a lead on the Y.E.D. Try not to throw a fit while we're out here?" His older brother huffed and turned away, Sam sighed and let a hand rest on his brother's shoudler. 

" _Dean,_ " He spoke softly, "I.. It's okay if you like him, you know that? You don't ha-"

"Sam, I got over the bisexual thing after nearly dying a couple of times. Guys are hot. Girls are hot.  Being attracted to the both?" He grinned that patented Dean Winchester 'Shit eating grin,' "Double the sex. Double the fun, especially when they agree to threesomes." He winked and Sam shuddered, this is not where he imagined this going. He did not want. Nope. Nope. Nope. "But the thing with Cas? It's a date, nothing more than that." 

A not yet seemed to hang in the air, one that neither acknowledged and that Dean maybe never would. Because he'd run from Cas, from a possible relationship, like he'd run from Lisa a year before. Because Lisa was the close to love he'd ever gotten and he'd nearly gotten her killed. Sam knew this and knew that Dean still blamed himself. He also knew that nothing would change this until they caught Y.E.D. and finished off the psycho bastard serial killer once and for all. But.. that wasn't their lives. Their lives were being city cops that were waaaay too good at undercover and even better at lying. Whose attempts at leaving the life had failed both ways, both times either of them had tried. It was at times like these though, like when Jess had died in an apartment fire while Sam was off with Dean, tracking down a father that ended up being dead as well, that Sam really hated his father. Himself. His mother. And the shit luck the Winchester bloodline seemed to carry. So many people dead. 

But really? It wasn't even their fault. It was no ones but a Yellow-eyes bastard demon of a man that had been killing men since Dean was 4 and he was less than six months. That at his six months had broken into their house and in an attempt at killing their father, male, dark hair, family man, two boys, his usual, had instead killed their mother and drugged Sammy. Sammy who had fallen into drug addiction after Jess' death only to find out that everything had been because Dean was next. Dean who joined the Marines and vanished and pissed off a killer that wanted his head, his head in place of their fathers. And really? It was a messed up story that if he thought too long about, seemed increasingly unfair and increasingly heartbreaking. 

"Sam," The urgency of Dean's voice awoke him from his thoughts and he looked up, "There's movement." Sam sat up immediately and reached for his gun; a moment later Dean placed a hand over his. "It's not him. Fuck." Sam relaxed once more, "Look's like we wasted our time." His brother muttered as they watched the junkie stroll pass the warehouse and back into the shadows. "Sam," He looked over and his brother squeezed his hand. "Next time." Dean promised and Sam shut his eyes and tried to believe him. He wanted this to be over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Review? No beta. Sorry for the mess.

**Author's Note:**

> Doing some edits. Rewrites as well. Sorry for the trouble.


End file.
